Where to Touch a Man in Bed - BEVERLY HILLS NEWS


Where exactly should you touch a man in bed? While you could argue that any zone on a dude’s body could be an erogenous zone if treated appropriately, there is evidence that some specific areas are more worth paying attention to than others when it comes to pleasure. Whether it’s because these areas are chock-full of nerve-endings (like your ears for example — who knew?!) others are on here simply because they’re so often easily overlooked (when was the last time you ran your fingers through your guy’s beard?)

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Of course, it’s easy to forget that so many different body parts can be erogenous zones, especially when in the heat of the moment undressing your partner. Add in if you’ve been together a while, know what works for you both, and get into the same routine of making-out-then-straight-to-sex before bed, and you might be surprised how little these e-zones actually get play. Show your partner some extra love by focusing on these areas next time to go truly above and beyond.

Here are 38 expert-approved hot spots and erogenous zones worth spending a few extra moments with next time you’re down and dirty with a naked man. To make things even easier (because how workable is “Ears: This can be hot.”?) we’ve also paired each body part with some easy, non-awkward ways to incorporate these areas into your next roll in the hay.


1. The Foreskin

You might think that most American guys are circumcised and therefore don’t have any foreskin, but according to a 2010 CDC study based on stats from 2007, 55.4% of newborn babies with penises left the hospital circumcised, which means the number of uncircumcised dudes is probably higher than you’d think. For those who do have their foreskin, this amounts to around 15 square inches (I KNOW RIGHT?) of bonus e-zone. “The foreskin is packed with nerve endings and stimulating the thin skin in this area lends a highly pleasurable experience,” says Mia Sabat, sex therapist at Emjoy. There’s also sensitivity on both the outside and inside surfaces of the foreskin, explains Georganne Chapin, Executive Director, Intact America.

Try this: Use a hand to move the foreskin up and down over the head of the penis itself, suggests Sabat. During oral, you can also focus on it by using a combo of your hand, tongue, and lips. Because of the sensitivity on both outside and inside of the foreskin, a rolling motion on the foreskin during sex can also be quite pleasurable, Chapin adds.

2. Lower Stomach

      Another nerve-filled area is the lower stomach, says Sabat, which becomes more and more concentrated closer to the genital area. Give the area right below their belly button but above their pubic bone or genitals some extra love to show them your affection and attention.

      Try this: Teasing and stimulating this area can feel super pleasurable for dudes through kissing, gentle biting, and temperature play, says Sabat. You can even experiment with some light pressure play, “but be warned: it’s best to try [pressure play] with an empty bladder,” Sabat adds. FAIR.

      3. Inner Arms

          The thin, soft skin of the inner arms makes this area ultra-sensitive, according to Sabat. Think about it, how often do you really give attention to your inner arms?

          Try this: While most of these erogenous zones can be stimulated through kissing or your tongue, the light, controlled movement of your fingers is especially great for inner arms. Stroke the skin from just inside their inner shoulder and move gently down to the inner elbow, says Sabat. If you and your partner are both into BDSM and have spoken about trying it out, pulling this move when your partner has his arms tied up (either in a fixed T-shape or just with their wrists above their head), can be really sexy too, Sabat adds.

          4. Inner Wrist

              Moving down the arm, stimulating the sensitive, thin skin of the inner wrist can also be incredibly pleasurable for your partner. Not only that, Sabat adds, but feeling your partner’s heart rate increasing as you get closer to their pulse point can also be a turn-on and empowering.

              Try this: The inner wrist is a great erogenous zone you can stimulate while both of you are in public (in a non-gross) way. Simply stroking your partner here or kissing their inner wrist here is a great way to show that you’re feeling sensual, Sabat says, and it’s just a pretty sweet move overall.

              5. Palm of Their Hands and Fingertips

                  Fun fact: your hands are actually some of the most sensitive and responsive areas of the body, says Sabat. This area is full of nerve-endings — a fact you probably already know if you’ve ever been bodied by a teensy paper-cut that somehow feels like someone cut your whole finger off.

                  Try this: “Take your partner’s palm in your hand and gently trace along the edges and lines of their palm with your fingertips,” says Sabat. Then, turn it up, by “kissing their palms and fingertips, or gently taking one finger into your mouth to suck, swirling your tongue around their finger and moving your lips along its length.”

                  6. Behind the Knee

                      Not only is this both thinner, sensitive skin, it’s also nerve-packed, says Sabat. It also gets points for being highly overlooked, because truly, have you ever considered paying extra attention to the under-knee area? I know I haven’t.

                      Try this: The area behind the knee can be a super versatile erogenous zone as it can be teased without being gross in public, but also focused on during sex when y’know, you’re back in private. Sabat says to try gently running your fingers over the area, or engaging with this bodily real estate during penetrative sex with touching, stroking, or dialing the intensity up a bit by applying pressure.

                      7. Anus

                          While you might’ve heard about the prostate being woza-levels of pleasurable for those with penises, even without the prostate, backdoor play can still be something pleasurable you engage in with your guy. There are tons of nerve endings in the anal region, says Sabat, and once you and your guy have discussed and okay-ed anal play on the table with ongoing consent, it can be a really hot experience for you both. Remember, as with all things butt play, the importance of lube, patience, and ongoing consent cannot be stressed enough. The anus doesn’t self-lubricate like a vagina, so lots of lube is a NEED for this situation.

                          Try this: For those who want to explore anal play but aren’t sure if they want to give or receive anal penetration quite yet, don’t worry, you can absolutely stimulate the anus without penetration. Sabat recommends starting with massaging your partner’s buttocks: “Stroke the entire area and place your hands on the folds where the legs and buttocks meet, then slide your fingers across the fold from the inner thigh to the outer area, before starting to caress the outside of the anus.” After that, if you and your partner have spoken about anal penetration as something you both want to do, then that’s when you can start thinking about moving towards penetration, with either your (well-lubed!) finger or toy.

                          8. Thigh

                              “Some of the best erogenous zones are places we can innocently caress in everyday life, and the thighs are an excellent example,” says Sabat. Thighs are similar to the groin or inner thigh, but much less intimate, so you can interact with the area in public without feeling gross.

                              Try this: Sabat recommends light touch or squeezing and gently massaging the area while sitting next to your partner. Specifically zone in on the space between their knee and halfway up the thigh, Sabat says, as this teasing movement will make them want more. When you are in private, you can also of course, cover this area with gentle licks, kisses, and even small bites (if that’s something you’re both into!)

                              9. Groin

                                  “Similar to the inner thighs, this region is so close to the genitals that having your partner tease this area can be equally frustrating and satisfying,” explains Sabat. The groin, aka where your abdomen transitions into the lower body and legs, is packed with nerve endings, and it just gets bonus points for being adjacent to the genitals.

                                  Try this: To really tease your partner, have them keep their underwear on while you run your fingers over the area slowly, before eventually moving to touch their skin, says Sabat. Once undressed, she suggests kissing and caressing the area, and especially doing so if you are giving oral, as this can make things even more intimate.

                                  10. Ears

                                  Ears are hyper sensitive to touch as there are tons of sensation receptors along the inside and outside of the ear, says Luna Matatas, sex and pleasure educator.

                                  Try this: Suck the top part of his ear and then run your tongue along the inside, says Matatas. Or you can try nibbling on his earlobe. The beauty of ear play is that when you’re that up close and personal, your hands are also free to roam the rest of his bod.

                                  11. Ribs

                                  “Anywhere on the body that has thinner skin is going to have more sensitivity to sensation and more possibility of blood flow during arousal,” Matatas explains.

                                  Try this: In case your guy is ticklish, test the area out first with slow, teasing touch. Matatas recommends slowly dragging your hands and fingers down the sides of their body or leaving a little breadcrumb trail of kisses or light nibbles on their ribs.

                                  12. Armpits

                                  Another sensitive spot that can also be ticklish, armpits are often overlooked but can still be super pleasurable for people. While the pits don’t have any special nerve endings, it can still be quite intimate because of its under-serviced status as an erogenous zone, says Matatas.

                                  Try this: Go for some sucking, licking, or light, teasing touch says Matatas. Armpits can also be mutually beneficial spots to pay attention to during sex since they secrete scent — great for feeling primal when you’re getting hot and heavy.

                                  13. Fingers

                                  What better place to start than the receptor points for experiencing touch? Just because you use them and they’re well, there, in every sex act doesn’t mean they can’t benefit from having the spotlight turned onto them as well.

                                  Try this: Matatas suggests massaging their fingers (because how great is that massage part during a manicure, right?), kissing your partner’s finger pads gently, dragging your teeth along the side of them lightly, or putting them in your mouth and dragging them out slowly. All the better if you turn up the eye contact during the last part.

                                  14. The Base of the Shaft

                                  The penis actually extends further into the body than you might see at first glance, adds Matatas, which means it’s a great place to play with pressure and other ways of turning up the blood flow.

                                  Try this: Using your fingers, find the base of the penis and explore with pressure. “At the base of the penis, explore putting pressure around the shaft with your index finger and thumb in an ‘ok’ symbol, pushing back towards the body,” says Matatas. While your fingers are getting to work, use your other free hand or mouth to stimulate the head of his penis.

                                  15. His Beard

                                  If your dude has facial hair, you can really work it to your advantage. Think about how sexy it feels when someone runs their fingers through your hair, says Kate W., co-founder of Pleasure Better. “For some reason,” she adds, “we never think about his beard being the same way.” Shame, isn’t it?

                                  Try this: Kate says to start at the base of his neck and trace your fingers up slowly through his beard, eventually running over his scalp. This trick feels so good that it’s not long before his fingers are eventually entangled in your hair as well.

                                  16. The Back of Their Neck

                                  This is a hot spot because of the many nerve endings there, explains sex expert Antonia Hall. It’ll also give you some “under-utilized hot spot” points because it’s often overlooked when it comes to getting it on.

                                  Try this: Hall recommends licking a trail just below his hairline, down his neck, and along the sides. You can also start with slow, sensual kisses, eventually easing your tongue to turn up any sensitivity.

                                  17. His Hair

                                  You know how good it feels when someone plays with your hair? Same thing for men, gals. “Men have nerve endings on their scalp that are attached to the rest of their body, and when their hair is gently pulled when they are kissed or held, it sends stimulation to the rest of their body,” says Tammy Nelson, PhD, sex and relationship therapist and independent consultant for Ashley Madison.

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                                  Try this: While kissing, try running the tips of your fingers through his hair, over his scalp gently, then a bit harder with a tug. “If he reacts with small sounds and pleasure moans, pull harder, then let go before he wants you to,” says Nelson. This playful tease with drive him legit cray.

                                  18. His Toes

                                  Shrimpin’ anyone? Yes, this is what it’s called when you suck on your partner’s toes (or they do to you.) “This is so erotic because feet are a nonconventional hotbed of sensation just waiting for some stimulation,” says sexologist Megan Stubbs.

                                  Try this: During sexy foreplay, move your kisses teasingly down his body until you’re all the way down at his feet. “Suck on your partner’s toes—or even lick the bottom of their foot arch,” says Stubbs. Just maybe have him take a shower before, mmk?

                                  19. The Feet in General

                                  Besides just feeling good, there’s a reason why reflexology massages are so popular. “There are so many nerve endings in the feet,” says sex therapist Rhoda Lipscomb, PhD—which makes for a great area to stimulate.

                                  Try this: Don’t worry, you don’t have to be a foot fetishist to ace this. “Start by using some massage oil and massaging his feet—especially the arch of the foot,” says Lipscomb. If you want to add some tongue and kisses to the mix, do it. Then switch positions and make it your turn.

                                  20. The Prostate

                                  Introducing: The most underrated part of a man’s body. “The prostate gland is a huge erogenous zone in men. If properly stimulated, this can bring intense pleasure to your man,” says Lipscomb. Ladies, this is basically the man’s G-spot and is extra sensitive.

                                  Try this: Run a lubricated finger around his anus to begin. This stimulation by itself may be enough for him, but if he’s down for more, once the muscles have had a chance to relax, insert your index finger about two inches inside—where you should be able to feel his prostate. “Bend your finger up toward his abdomen and stroke it,” says Lipscomb.

                                  21. His Imagination

                                  Okay, so maybe this isn’t a tangible thing you can touch–but in my defense, you can definitely still stimulate this part of him. “Let him have some time to consider your touch before your fingers arrive on his skin,” says Nelson. The ultimate tease.

                                  Try this: “Whisper in his ear softly and tell him all the things you are going to do to him without touching a hair on his body,” says Nelson. No idea WTF to say? Just pretend like you’re sexting and say those things to him IRL.

                                  22. His Butt Cheek

                                  Ah, the “sweet spot” of the bod. “He’s going to be extra sensitive here,” says Good Vibrations staff sexologist Carol Queen, PhD. “Striking his butt cheek, even lightly, tends to stimulate the whole area.” Think of it like a slow vibration flowing through his insides.

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                                  Try this: If your boy is open to a little spank-y play, this is great to do while he’s on top of you in any variation of missionary. Squeeze his booty when he’s hitting just the right spot, or give him a quick spank if you’re both into it. “Don’t be afraid to grab or stroke there,” says Queen.

                                  23. The Philtrum

                                  Dr. Jess O’Reilly, sexologist, explains that the philtrum, or small groove above your lips, has long been considered an erogenous zone. In fact, she explains, the word itself, “philtrum,” translates from the Latin word for “love potion.”

                                  Try this: To stimulate his philtrum, O’Reilly suggests planting a very soft kiss on this area, right before running your tongue down the groove to meet his upper lip.

                                  24. The Raphe

                                  O’Reilly explains that the raphe is the dividing line that runs across the the middle of his genitalia from the anus to the tip of his penis, down over the perineum, scrotum, and shaft.

                                  Try this: O’Reilly suggests using your tongue to trace over the line and teasing him into your mouth. To take things a step further, she suggests using a lubed up bullet vibrator like the We-Vibe Tango, to trace along the line as well, while you breathe, lick, and suck in conjunction with the vibrator.

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                                  25. Inner Thigh

                                  Eboni Harris, a relationship therapist, says that since the inner thigh is so close to the penis, “even without the sensation of touch, just being in that area is sure to get him anticipating what’s next.”

                                  Try this: Harris suggests taking your time to kiss and lick his inner thigh before going to touch his penis when performing oral. Tease him and experiment with your lips. You can go from light fluttering kisses to harder sucking.

                                  26. Bottom Lips

                                  Harris says that lips in general are one of the most sensitive parts of the body. Take your time while kissing—there’s a reason why nibbling and variation in pressure can drive you over the edge when done correctly.

                                  Try this: Harris suggests nibbling their bottom lips and possibly even going for a harder bite (if they seem receptive to it). “The sensations of going from a tender kiss to some teeth will surprise your man and excite his brain.”

                                  27. Those V-Lines

                                  Besides being hot and fun for you to look at, the V-zone is a hot bed of pleasure for your partner, as clinical sexologist and psychotherapist Kristie Overstreet explains. Not only is it a turn-on that he gets front-row tickets to watch you stimulate him, but it’s an easy pit stop to make on the way to bone-town.

                                  Try this: Have him lay on his back while you straddle him and give him what he really wants: a view of your scalp as you make your way down on him. Starting from his belly button, use your fingers and nails to trace a line down from his happy trail stopping before you hit total groin. Then retrace your steps, but use your tongue to trace a V shape from his hips to right above his penis. Draw it out and really tease him until he can’t take it any longer.

                                  28. The Outside of His Lower Lip

                                  You know that spot between your lower lip and your chin where you usually break out? Yeah, the one that one hair always sprouts out of? That’s an erogenous zone! Lou Paget, author of The Big O and a certified sex educator, says that they’ve discovered that this tiny, delicate curve is actually packed with extrasensitive nerve receptors.

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                                  Try this: Suck his lower lip into your mouth the next time you’re making out and use the tip of your tongue to stroke this under-lip area. “That motion stimulates the whole erogenous zone in a teasing way, which will put him on the erotic edge,” says Paget. “And by keeping his lower lip inside yours, you magnify the sensation. It’ll feel as if electric currents are shooting from his mouth straight to his member.”

                                  29. The Front of His Neck

                                  I bet you’ve never thought about your dude’s Adam’s apple as an erogenous zone, huh? If you have, congrats, you should probably be writing this instead of me. But for the normies out there, the thought behind this stems from how the thyroid (just below the Adam’s apple) is “closely linked to the sex organs, according to ancient Chinese medicine,” according to reflexologist Mantak Chia, author of Sexual Reflexology.

                                  Try this: Give him a throat job—no, not like that, (you can re-hinge your jaw now.) Have him lie on his back and literally just suck his Adam’s apple. Keep your tongue flat and light, not too much pressure! Massage the area with wide circular motions to ensure you’re hitting that T-spot of the thyroid.

                                  30. His Nipples

                                  While male nipples are basically the same as female nipples, they might even be more sensitive than yours since guys aren’t used to having them touched so often. “For a lot of men, their nipples are uncharted territory—an erogenous zone they haven’t experimented with,” explains Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles–based clinical sexologist and author of the The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Sensual Massage. Touch them, however, and you’ll send shock waves of pleasure radiating through him, she adds.

                                  Try this: Britton suggests having him lie on his back and slowly licking from his areola inward, like an ice-cream cone but never touching tongue to nip. Get closer and closer until you flick his nipple with your tongue and then gently bite it. Britton says, “Men love when you slowly build up the pressure like that, so don’t be afraid to nip him harder than you would like to be.” If you wanna be really extra, you can suck on an ice cube beforehand for more sensation.

                                  31. The Dip Under His Ankle

                                  Yes, the spot that always gets fucked up when you wear new shoes! Between your guy’s heel and ankle there’s a fingertip-size pressure point that holds “enormous passion potential,” according to Laura Norman, author of Feet First. “This spot is linked to the sex organs” and “pressing it releases energy, producing feelings of pleasure.”

                                  Try this: While in reverse-cowgirl, grab his feet and pulse each pressure point in rhythm with your thrusts. Try this right before he’s about to climax to really blow his mind.

                                  32. His Perineum

                                  While he’s shy at first about going under his family jewels, the perineum is well worth the trip. This patch of skin is located between his balls and his anus and is right above his prostate gland—an organ with “major orgasmic power.” Tracey Cox, author of Supersex, says a few soft strokes here will drive him to the brink.

                                  Try this: Before he enters you in missionary, reach between his legs and grab his penis. Then press your knuckles gently into this spot and start massaging. Right as he’s about to orgasm, push your knuckles a little deeper to extend the fireworks.

                                  33. His Shaft

                                  The male sex organ…where to start? It’s there. Everyone knows this is a huge part of sex. And while you may have mastered the typical handy and blow job, try to spice things up with something totally uncharted like a reverse finger job.

                                  Try this: Make two tight rings around his penis with your thumb and index finger (like you’re doing the okay hand symbol 👌), stacking them one on top of the other in the middle of his shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of his shaft at the same time. Cox calls this a “torrid twist” the the typical one-handed uppy-downy handy. Remember to use lube though!

                                  34. The Head of His Penis

                                  As the most sensitive part of the penis, the head can be a fickle art to master. Barbara Keesling, PhD, and author of The Good Girl’s Guide to Bad Girl Sex, says it can be tricky to get the right level of pressure so you send him soaring into ecstasy but without recoiling in sensory overload.

                                  Try this: Give him a lipstick blow job—aka where you brush your closed but relaxed lips against the head of his penis, like you’re applying lipstick. Hold his shaft with your fingers, but not in a fist (avoid holding his penis like a microphone, but do approach it with the same blind confidence of a mediocre stand-up act). Keesling suggests varying the sensations by opening your mouth a bit and rubbing his head between them.

                                  35. The Seam of His Testicles

                                  You know the spot where Gepetto glued your boy’s balls onto his body? Or like how socks always have a seam in them? Well, your guy’s got one that separates his testicles and keeps them from becoming one big testilump. Cox says it’s a nerve-rich pleasure trail that runs top to bottom along his scrotum, and it’s vastly underappreciated.

                                  Try this: Cradle his balls in one hand while gently pressing the first two fingertips of your other hand into the top of the crease (close to where the testicles connect to the base of his penis). Then trace downward with your fingers until you reach the bottom of his scrotum. But don’t forget to be gentle!

                                  36. His Frenulum

                                  The F-spot is the little nubbin of flesh underneath the crown of his penis connecting the head to the shaft. It’s often overlooked because it’s part of the undercarriage, but Britton says there’s actually a bundle of nerves at this point that when touched “set off an amazing chain reaction of rapture.”

                                  Try this: The next time you’re going down on him, hold his penis steady with one hand while really giving his crown your all. Each time you circle your tongue around to his frenulum, flick it a few times with your tongue stiffened, and then relax and go back to licking the crown.

                                  37. His Lower Back

                                  If you’re looking for a way to turn your partner way TF up without even taking his pants off, look no further. As clinical sexologist and psychotherapist Kristie Overstreet explains, the pudendal nerve that stimulates all the areas of the groin is located here, at the bottom of the spinal cord.

                                  Try this: Have your partner take his shirt off and lay on his stomach with his arms by his side. Hot tip: Keep his pants on, but pull them down a few inches for a tantalizing never-nude experience. Lightly run your fingers or anxiety-ravaged cuticles down across his lower back, stopping before you hit ass cheek.

                                  38. His Earlobes

                                  TBH, this is totally an underrated sensitive li’l pocket of skin you’re probably neglecting during your normal hookups—just think about how jumpy you get when someone whispers in your ear!

                                  Try this: Overstreet suggests kissing your partner across his shoulder, up his neck, and stopping right before you hit his ear. Do this to both sides, because asymmetry is for the lazy. When he’s right about to lose it, start kissing his earlobe, and use your tongue to bring his earlobe into your mouth. Play around with gentle nibbles, tongue, etc. Be careful not to touch any other part of his body while doing this, and see how wild he gets from you just touching his earlobes.


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